I Love School!!

So I am finally back at school and I feel so at home here. I have realized how much I have come to love college. Even to the point where I am sad that my undergrad is almost over. I don't want to be done with school. I know that ministry will be exciting and I will love it but I love just sitting at the feet of some of the most brilliant people as they teach me about the Bible and help fashion and strengthen my relationship with God.
So I think I am going to stay here for grad school. Of course this all could change very quickly but for now I just feel like this is the place I need to be to get the education I am desiring. Perhaps I will have the opportunity to go to Oxford or even Israel to do some studies but for now, I am content in the little town of Abilene.

When You Come Back Down

You gotta leave me now
You've got to go alone
You gotta chase a dream
One that's all your own
Before it slips away

When you're flyin high
Take my heart along
I'll be the harmony
To every lonely song
That you'll learn to play

When you're soarin through the air
I'll be solid ground
Take every chance you dare
I'll still be there
When you come back down
When you come back down

I'll keep lookin up
Awaiting your return
My greatest fear will be
That you will crash and burn
And I won't feel you fire

I'll be the other hand
That always holds the line
Connecting in between
Your sweet heart and mine
I'm strung out on that wire

And I'll be on the other end
To hear you when you call
Angel you were born to fly
But if you get too high
I'll catch you when you fall
Catch you when you fall

The memories the sunshine
Every new day brings
I know the sky is calling
Angel let me help you with your wings

When you're soaring through the air
I'll be solid ground
Take every chance you dare
I'll still be there
When you come back down

When you come back down...

Windmills

I spend too much time
Raiding windmills
We go side by side
Laugh until it's right

It's something that you won't show
Waiting where the light goes
Take the darkest hour
Break it open
Water to repair
What we have broken

It's something that you won't show
Waiting where the light goes
Maybe anyway the wind blows
It's all worth waiting for

Pull down the borders to lighten the load
Tell all the passengers we're goin home

I spend too much time seeking shelter
World without end
Couldn't hold her

iIt's somethin that you won't show
Waiting where the light goes
Maybe anyway the wind blows
It's all worth waiting for

Anyway the wind blows

How do I Trust?

Lately, I have been bombarded with choices and decisions that will potentially effect my future. There are times when I am totally certain of something and then the next moment, that feeling goes away and I am back to stage 1 wondering what to do.
God's message in the Hebrew Bible is one of trust and full reliance on him. But in times like this, I see why Israel had so many problems trusting in the invisible God. There are times when God is silent, I feel at this point, that maybe he is. I have prayed earnestly that God would consume my mind and take these thoughts away and that he would hhandle this whole situation. But somehow, I come to a feeling that God is wanting me to stop hiding and get up and face this problem. But where does this lead me in my trust?
In II Kings, Asa is faced with an unimagineable problem. 1,000,000 Ethiopians are at his doorstep. Asa prays to God and says, "We rely on you..." and God delivers them from the impossible. But soon after, Judah is being threatened by neighboring Israel, and so who do you think Asa turns to? Not God, but try the King of Syria. God is furious with Asa, and rightfully so, considering that he just delivered him in probably the most miraculous victory in history. But am I so different from Asa? I have seen the rewards of reliance on God. But continually, I try to solve my own problems. Why? How is it that I can read those stories and not be changed to the core and find my trust in this God?

Psalm 22
"My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?
Why are you so far from saving me, so far from the words of my groaning?
My God, I cry out by day, but you do not answer,
by night, and am not silent.
Yet you are enthroned as the Holy One;
you are the praise of Israel.
In you our ancestors put their trust;
they trusted and you delivered them.
They cried to you and were saved;
in you they trusted and were not dissappointed."

Lord of the...Song?

It has been just over a week since I left Kansas. It has not been the best experience either. I have been staying in a hotel while the construction people finish the apartment complex I am to move in to. So while staying in a Hotel, I have been making my way back to campus to work as a desk worker at a dorm. Let me tell you, there is nothing more boring than just sitting in front of a computer for 8 hours watching movies and occasionally seeing someone pass by. So I have tried entertaining myself in other ways:
I am taking Hebrew with my brother as the teacher. Not only is it one of the weirdest things in the world to have your brother as one of your college professors, but the work is also difficult! So as I sit here at the desk asking myself if the $6 an hour I am making sitting here doing nothing is worth it, my brother will call me periodically and ask me to tell him the Hebrew Alphabet. No, I don't know it yet, but I'm on my way!
The next area of entertainment I have is singing. I am known throughout the population of the Sophomore girls as "that one desk worker who sings all the time." Yes, I sit at my desk and sing along to the many tunes I have on my computer. The only thing that makes this week special is the fact that George Pendergrass, one of my heros and a former singer in Acappella, is staying about 10 feet away from me. I have been hoping he will hear my music and come in and sing with me!!
The other thing I have been thinking about is my worship team that I am heading up pretty soon. I have to come up with a new name for the chapel time and find some singers. I also have the task of making the group more ethnically diverse. This makes it harder because I have enough trouble finding people who can sing, now I have to be a little bit more specific. I get so excited about singing here because I think it is one of the strengths of ACU. When the Freshman class comes in a hears the singing for the first time, they are completely amazed! I love being a part of that. I can see why God would love to hear our praise. I think that singing is one of the times when people get focused on God the most. My generation responds to good music more than anything else. If there is a way to reach my age group in the gospel it is to have good music involved.
Singing is a way to show your emotion to God that is very ancient. Mariam sing and played the tambourine to God, David sang and danced and played the harp before God, the early church sang and played songs to God. Music is an ability given to us by the almighty to please him. May our worship always be pleasing to El Shaddai.

I Will Bring You Home

Michael Card has a powerful song in his collection called "I Will Bring You Home." Never had this song effected me so much as when I was able to visit the town of Greensburg here in Kansas. For those of you who don't know, Greensburg was hit by an F5 tornado just before the Summer started that had a base that was over 2 miles wide at one point. I drove through the town with Toby (my boss) and was able to see the horror of what all these people lost. As soon as I started driving through the streets I began singing this song in my head:

"Though you are homeless

Though you're alone

I will be your home.

Whatevers the matter

Whatevers been done,

I will be your home.

I will be your home

I will be your home

In this fearful fallen place,

I will be your home.

When time reaches fullness,

When I move my hand

I will bring you home

Home to your own place,

In a beautiful land

I will bring you home.

I will bring you home

I will bring you home

From this fearful fallen place,

I will bring you home

I will bring you home."

What an incredible God we have. We can ask ourselves for all time why bad things like this tragedy happen and spend our time blaming God for its happening. Or, we can see that God truly cares for us as a mother cares for her child and wishes to be our home. Even though our earthly homes may fall apart or blow away, our true home awaits us with open arms.

God Can't?

I have talked to some people about my views of the openness of God and his decision to enter in to our world to have a relationship with us and in so doing, gives up the ability to know the future. I have stated a true statement by my standards in saying that God knows all that can be known. If you wrap your mind around this truly, you will agree with me. So I have been accused of limiting God in my beliefs. I mean, saying that God cannot know something (even though that is not what I say) is a harracy isn't it? I have struggled with these accusations considering that there is one belief that seems very common among Christians that came about from misinterpretation. The belief that God cannot look upon sin or even be near it.


There is no passage in the Bible that ever states that God cannot be near sin. There is talk about a separation from God that is mended by the death of Jesus, but nowhere does it say anything about God having the inability to go near because we sin. The most common passage used to keep this notion alive is when Jesus cries out, "eloi, eloi lama sabacthani!" He asks why God has forsaken him so some people conclude that God turned his back on Jesus because he could not look at him anymore because he was carrying sin. Once again, it does not say this anywhere in the text.



Once looking at the big picture, one can see why Jesus would say this. It is an obvious quote from Psalm 22 (it even says it in the footnote). If you read Psalm 22, you will find such quotes as: "All who see me mock at me; my mouth is dried up like a potsherd, and my tongue sticks to my jaws; For dogs are all around me; a company of evildoers encircles me. They have pierced my hands and feet;"
I bleive that Jesus was quoting this Psalm on the cross. All the people there were good Jews. But they knew scriptures not by number or verse, but by the first line of the psalm. So Jesus does not say "Psalm 22!!" but says the first line so that they would run the lines I quoted earlier in their minds and realize the connection.

They say that I limit God, I think that this is a huge limitation on God! God certainly can look upon sin if he wants to. He can look at it all day if he wants! God did not turn his back on Jesus. Jesus says that statement to open the minds of the people there and make them think about what they have done. A more puzzling question about sin is that if God is the creator of all things, did he create evil? Did he create sin? If he didn't, then there is something in the world that man created that God had nothing to do with. Don't think too hard.