My conversation with Tim

Tim is handicapped. Tim cannot speak. Tim can barely walk. Tim can understand me perfectly, but he cannot respond in a conventional manner. Tim has a small card which has the alphabet and numbers 0-9 on it. To speak to me, he must spell out every word he wants to say.

We arrived at the Achievement Center that morning and when I met Tim he was sitting and conversing with two girls from the Youth Group. He looked at me and spelled out, "Are you Christians?" We all said yes and asked him the same. He responded with a very definite "Oh yeah!" They were going bowling so we all piled in and followed them to the ally. When we got settled, I sat down next to Tim and he asked, "How long have you been a Christian?" I responded that I had been raised in the church and that I received the bulk of my faith from my parents. He asked me if I could pray for him. "Sure! Do you have anything specific you need prayers for?" "I a m v e r y w e a k, " Tim responded. He told me that he was struggling with his faith and that he felt very troubled. So I prayed. I prayed out loud for Tim. After I finished, he tapped me and spelled out "W O W." I looked at him puzzled and asked what he meant. "You are very strong," he responded. He asked me how I got to have such strong faith. I told him that I just read the Bible a lot and try to know God more intensely. He asked me, "What do you do when you feel weak?" I told him that I read stories in the Bible about people who felt weak sometimes and see what they did and how God reacted to them. "D A V I D." I was so excited when Tim said David. We talked about how he was our favorite character in the Bible. Then he said, "I wish I had your strength."

I wish I had Tim's strength. Tim has a much harder life than I do. There are so many things that Tim will never get to experience that I can. Yet, Tim has some few small doubts. A man who could curse God for all that has happened to him chooses to believe and have faith anyway. But I, who have more than I could ask for in my own life, who squanders the good gifts I receive, I doubt God's power in my own life. I wish I had Tim's strength and Tim's faith.
I thought about the story in John when the people ask Jesus who sinned that the man was born blind. Jesus tells them no one but that he was born blind to glorify God. I struggle with that. How could a person whose life is made so much harder from a disability be glorifying to God? For the first time, I understood what Jesus meant by this I think. Tim was glorifying God by teaching me a lesson. It's funny, I am around some brilliant people at ACU all the time. Professors and scholars who teach me so much about God and the Text. I love that! Yet, it took a 21 year-old man who couldn't even speak a word to me to teach me more about God's love than I had ever learned before.